Directed by Ang Lee, starring Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliott, Josh Lucas, and Nick Nolte
From Universal Pictures and the Oscar-winning director of Life of CGI- I mean Pi- comes the one modern superhero movie that, to this day, makes me want to smash every time I watch it.
Eric Bana plays Bruce, a brilliant but emotionally distant scientist who, along with fellow scientist and ex-girlfriend, Betty (Jennifer Connelly), blow up frogs with gamma radiation in an effort to cure... something. I don't know, I forgot. Anyways, Bruce gets caught in a blast of radiation and survives, but now whenever he gets angry, he transforms into a rampaging, badly computer-generated, not-so-jolly green giant. A grizzly old fart named David Banner (Nick Nolte) begins stalking Bruce, claiming to be his father. Speaking to his son in riddles, we can guess- really, we can only guess- Banner passed some kind of side effect of self-experimentation on to his boy that was then triggered by Bruce's accident. There's also Betty's general dad (Sam Elliot) who wants the Hulk for something (still not sure), and some douchebag (Josh Lucas) that also has an interest in Bruce, but also has an interest in getting into Betty's pants.
This is not an adaptation of The Incredible Hulk. Universal and Ang Lee had no faith in the source material whatsoever. Don't let the comic book panel-style split-screens and editing fool you; Hulk is a film ashamed that it's based on a comic book. There's no sense of entertainment value. It's all so, so serious. You might as well call this movie The Incredible Sulk (Thank you, Don Jamieson). Performance-wise, you've got mopey (Bana and Connelly) and crazy (Nolte, Elliot, and Lucas) and nothing else. Nobody seems to be having any fun in this movie. And Lee completely misses the point of the character. The Incredible Hulk is the Jeckyll and Hyde of the post-Atomic Age. He represents something base in us as human beings we all keep buried inside us, be it rage or anything else we don't want anyone to see. Instead, Ang Lee and co-writer James Schamus decided to blame The Hulk on Daddy.
|Papa, can you hear me?|
|Visit your local adoption center today.|
Does this version of Ol' Jade Jaws still make you want to Hulk out? Sound off in the comments below. You can also follow me on Twitter: @DoctorSplatter